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Hello.

 I went to college to learn how to spell and it's not going great for me.

We Discovered A Planet That Could Support Life And NASA Don't You Dare Fuck This Up

We Discovered A Planet That Could Support Life And NASA Don't You Dare Fuck This Up

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(CNN)You may want to get used to the name Ross 128 b. The newly discovered exoplanet is the second-closest found to our solar system, only 11 light-years away. And it could support life.

Announcements about exoplanets, those found outside our solar system, seem almost commonplace in this golden age of discovery for astronomers. So why is Ross 128 b unique -- apart from its rather human-sounding name?
The planet is about the same size as Earth, and it may have a similar surface temperature, making it a temperate world that could support life.
Every 9.9 days, it completes an orbit around its host star, Ross 128, which is what's known as a red dwarf star: They're the coolest, faintest and most common stars found in the universe.

Well gosh that article has a bunch of words I don’t understand. But that doesn’t mean I’m not hyped up on mountain dew over it. This is what we’ve been waiting for! I just told you guys that Mars is a huge bust. It sucks. We all got our hopes up over it. We had our fingers crossed that it could support life, but it ended up just being another lame rock. Well here comes Ross 128 b with a big swingin’ dick! Only 11 light years away (is that far? I don’t know anything about space) and with a temperate climate that wouldn’t melt us! Sure having a day/night cycle that lasts 9.9 days would be a little weird, but also sounds a little kinky so fuck it!

This is huge. A new home: a place to ruin once we’re done with this shit hole.

Here you go NASA, this is a softball. Hit this bad boy out of the park! It’s not your fault that Mars didn’t pan out but we blame you anyway. Here’s your chance at redemption. How are we not already on the way?

Little Girl On Mission To Hug Police Officer In Every State

Little Girl On Mission To Hug Police Officer In Every State

FDA Says That Uncooked Flour May Have E. Coli In It, And I Say The FDA Can Go Fuck Themselves

FDA Says That Uncooked Flour May Have E. Coli In It, And I Say The FDA Can Go Fuck Themselves