Woman Wins Dumbest Criminal Of The Year After Trying To "Shoplift" $1100 Worth Of Goods In Front Of 65 Cops: And By "Shoplift" I Mean Push Her Grocery Cart Into The Parking Lot Without Paying

Dec 21

Dec 21 Woman Wins Dumbest Criminal Of The Year After Trying To "Shoplift" $1100 Worth Of Goods In Front Of 65 Cops: And By "Shoplift" I Mean Push Her Grocery Cart Into The Parking Lot Without Paying

FRAMINGHAM (CBS) — A woman accused of shoplifting from a Framingham store did not seem to be phased by the heavy police presence already there Tuesday night. Sixty-five uniformed police officers had filled Target for a “Shop with a Cop” charity event with local kids.

Melissa Allen, 32, walked into the store while the event was going on and spoke to some of the officers participating.

According to police, she then filled a Rubbermaid bin with over $1,000 worth of items and tried to push her cart out of the store without paying. They said she was also carrying stolen jewelry.

Full store here.

Here’s an idea: if you’re going to shoplift something, don’t shoplift it in front of 65 cops. That just seems like something you shouldn’t do. How hard is it to go to another store?? Find one other place within a five minute walk that doesn't have any police officers there! That's a basic foundation of crime: it should be done in the absence of police! Jesus Christ this is a lazy move.

giphy165

Here’s another idea: if you’re going to insist on shoplifting in front of 65 cops, don’t shoplift $1100 worth of goods. That just seems greedy. Come on, shoplift a candy bar and a hat like everybody else- this is Walmart not Ocean’s 11.

giphy166

Here’s the craziest idea of all: if you insist on shoplifting $1100 worth of goods in front of 65 police officers than for the love of god find a better way to do it than just walking your shopping cart out the front door. This shouldn’t even be called shoplifting! I thought shoplifting was the laziest crime of all time and this is lazier. To call this shoplifting is honestly an insult to shoplifters, because this is that stupid. Does this ever work? The whole point of just walking out with something is to be inconspicuous, but pushing out a shopping cart is VERY conspicuous, so basically this woman’s a fucking idiot. Dumb, dumb, deserves to be arrested, dumb.