Alright, I'll Say It: NASA Gets A Win

(CNN) NASA's New Horizons spacecraft is making history again, this time one-upping the legendary Voyager 1.

On December 5, 2017, it broke a record set by Voyager 1 in 1990.

NASA said in a statement that New Horizons snapped a picture of a group of stars known as the "Wishing Well" when the spacecraft was about 3.79 billion miles (6.12 billion kilometers) from Earth.

New Horizons broke its own record a couple of hours later that day by taking images of two space rocks in the Kuiper Belt, a disc-shaped region beyond Neptune that may be home to hundreds of thousands of icy worlds and a trillion or more comets, according to a NASA statement.

Full story here.

As anybody who’s read this blog, who’s anybody, or has spoken to me ever know, I hate NASA. I hate NASA with 98% of my being. I think they’re underachievers. I think they aim too low. I don’t trust them save us in an Armageddon situation, I don’t trust them to find aliens. If they do find aliens, I don’t trust them to make friends with them. I find no shortage of faults with NASA. However, as an unbiased news source, I have to cover their diamond-in-the-rough success just as I cover their traditional standard of mediocrity- and so here we are: NASA has successfully taken the farthest photos from Earth in history.

That’s impressive. It doesn’t really matter whether they have any competition at all in that department, or that I can’t tell what the fuck they’re taking photos of. It just matters that they’re the best at it. It brings me to my usual point, when you’re NASA, and you have all of the greatest minds, money, and space potential in the world, you’ve got to be the best at what you do. That applies for the cool stuff, like discovering new planets and exploring the shit out of space: and it applies for the not cool stuff, like taking blurry photos that nobody can recognize.

I mean, you tell me how sweet these photos are...

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure some science nerds are looking at these photos and cumming themselves as we speak, but to the average dude who clicks on NASA articles daily just waiting for their next fuck up, these photos look like nothing. Anyway, as I said before, who am I to critique a picture of space rocks, let alone a victory? A win’s a win.

While that makes NASA 1-99, that’s still one game better than the Blood Bringers so I can’t say a damn thing, other than “congratulations,” of course.