REINHOLDS, Lancaster County — The first three of seven dogs rescued from a dog meat farm in South Korea and slated for placement with Delaware Valley Golden Retriever Rescue arrived in Reinholds late last week, the agency announced Tuesday. The dogs, who were saved as part of a rescue mission conducted by Humane Society International, were taken from Namyangju, South Korea to Dulles International Airport before being transported to Lancaster County.

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Here’s a classic feel-good story: a few dogs were rescued from a South Korean dog farm and are now with the Delaware Valley Golden Re--- WAIT OH MY GOD PEOPLE EAT GOLDEN RETRIEVERS? Maybe this is absurd to not have realized, but I just thought people ate mangy dogs! Am I ridiculous to think that?

Look I know that it doesn’t mean the dogs are any less “valuable”, but bite me, I think there’s a little bit of a difference between eating a dog you find living in a trash pile, and eating Air Bud. My system is in shock from this. You can’t eat Golden Retrievers! They’re for playing! I feel like you can eat EVERY OTHER DOG, but not a Golden. Golden’s have lifespans of what, eight years? They’re literally a breed of dog that is designed to be your kid’s best friend from ages 6-14 and then die, you can’t eat them! I thought you could only eat dogs that you caught in the wild! You’ll never see a Golden Retriever in the wild! They’re our family dogs, and I'm willing to declare war on any country that says otherwise. Golden Retrievers, not for eating.