Little Kid Fucks Around In The Mud And Finds A Rare Fossil

Mar 21

Mar 21 Little Kid Fucks Around In The Mud And Finds A Rare Fossil

(CNN) Naomi was bored. A 6-year-old can stay riveted by her older sister's soccer game for only so long.

So she went over to some sagebrush by the soccer field, poked around in the dirt, and picked up a small rock. Something about its swirls reminded her of the mystical necklace from Disney's "Moana."

That was last October.

Earlier this month, Naomi's family learned what the rock really is: a rare, 65 million-year-old fossil.

In some cases -- some extremely rare cases -- ammonites can fetch between $40,000 to $50,000.

Full story here.

You’ve got to be kidding me. Fate's a real asshole sometimes. Some little kid is just eating dirt and stumbles across a dinosaur fossil worth 50 grand. Kids have it easy these days. You know how much time I spent messing around in dirt as a kid? Too much. I ever found anything cool, I just got super dirty. I hope that’s what happened! It’d be even worse to have found a bunch of fossils in my grasp and then tossed them aside because I cared more about eating ants or whatever the fuck I was doing.

I hate to say it, but I’ll say it: this fossil is wasted on this little kid. This little kid won’t appreciate this rock at all; the idiot thinks it’s from Moana! What’s this girl gonna do, donate it? Put it on her desk? If you’re post-college and find this thing, it drastically changes things. Your life is different. Suddenly you’ve got museum tours, $50,000 in your pocket, and you’re officially an archeologist. That’s how being an archeologist works, right? You find one fossil and you are one? This young child isn’t even going to remember this. Also, too selfish to even watch her sister play soccer? Doesn’t sound like she deserves a fossil to me!

Best case scenario here is one of her parents buys her a knockoff rock from some gift shop and sells this bad boy to a museum for an inflated price. At least then someone wins.