Businesses have had to embrace social distancing during the pandemic, and perhaps none more so than an English pub which installed an electric fence to keep thirsty customers at bay.

Jonny McFadden, who runs the Star Inn in St Just, Cornwall, told CNN that he installed the electric fence in front of the pub's bar for social distancing purposes.

"It's a very small pub, the first and last rural pub in Cornwall," he said.

McFadden said he wanted "to put some rope, or chain" to make sure customers kept back from staff at the bar but couldn't find suitable equipment.

"I thought, this is not going to keep them [the customers] back," he said. So instead, he opted for the fence to see "what that does."

Full story here.

Brilliant. Utitilitarianism at a it’s finest. And, i might add, one step closer to my world famous communal taser idea.

Honestly, guys we’re one step away. Sure, a customer gets a little too comfy next to the bar, or gets a little out of hand, you can push them into the fence. I like that. I respect it. But think of how much easier it would be to tase them. You’re already half way there. Just saying. I digress.

Love this for a couple reasons. First of all, this is ingenuity if I’ve ever seen it. If some fucking bar in Brooklyn tried this it’d be fine, kind of funny maybe, but also super weird. That’s partially on Brooklyn, but also just due to the bar scene in the states. This is perfect for Cornwall. I love that these people were going to try and get wire, or wood, and just realized that it was way easier to get an electric fence. That’s farm to table, baby. Leave it to England to forgo the niceties and just lay things out the way they are. “You can drink but if you stand too close to the bar you’re going to get shocked like cattle.” 

This brings me to my second point. This just shows how badly we need to go out to bars.  Look, we’re all on the same page here: drinking on your own is not as fun. That’s so much the case that we’re willing to be treated like cows to avoid it. Yes please put me in a small electrified enclosure I just want to see someone who’s not my mom. Why stop there? If you told me I could drink at bar if I got my ears tagged and my ass branded, I don’t know if it would be an automatic yes, but it would be a long conversation in the mirror for sure.  We’re so far out of the old box we’re on the prowl for a new one.  No way this would have flown before now. But that was before. This is now. This is us. We’re so desperate to drink with strangers that we’ll hook our nipples up to a generator.  Electric fences are going to be like juke boxes now, one in every bar. Pool tables taken? 15 bucks if Trev grabs the fence for 5 seconds. Things are looking up. 

I miss drinking with people so goddamn much. No way someone who sweats and patns as much as I do is allowed out in the new world.