Apparently Feeding Day Care Kids Melatonin-Laced Gummy Bears Before Nap Time Is Frowned Upon

Three Illinois daycare workers accused of feeding kids laced gummy bears have been arrested and charged with endangering children, according to multiple reports Monday. The candies were allegedly laced with melatonin, which people often use to help with sleep issues, in an attempt to put a class of 2 to 3-year-old children to bed.

CBS Chicago reported a manager at Kiddie Junction Daycare in Des Plaines, Illinois, called police and alleged that workers had handed out the laced gummy bears to a class of about a dozen kids.

Full story here.

Okay so a couple day care workers fed a bunch of kids melatonin to put them into dreamland for a few goddamn moments of peace. I'm waiting for the bad part. It's called naptime for a reason motherfuckers, any parent naive enough to think that a stranger is going to put your kid to bed without the help of narcotics is off their fucking rocker and should lose custody.

I don’t care what standard you hold for how you treat your kids, you can’t expect three people to hold down the fort with the children of twenty strangers. Those kids are little shits. They haven’t developed perspective yet, they think they run the universe, and there’s no way they’re going to listen to you if you aren’t named “mom” or “dad”. I kind of just assumed every daycare gave kids melatonin before nap time. How the fuck else are they supposed to sleep? I went to day care when I was a kid, and I’m positive that nobody gave me any drugs to catch some zzz’s. You know how I know? Because I got super bored and antsy every nap time, and one time I broke, just lost my mind, and shoved a bunch of pebbles up my nose. That was painful. Very painful.I don’t care what my parents thought, I would have traded those pebbles for melatonin laced gummy bears in a second. That may have been before I had a diabetic seizure after eating tequila-soaked gummy bears, but that’s not the point.

These parents are the biggest hypocrites I’ve ever seen. Unless one of these kids is actually allergic to melatonin, this is the biggest overreaction I’ve ever seen. These parents should be thanking these workers! These parents should be asking them whether they sell these gummy bears after hours! Gummy bears that make your kids go to sleep? That’s amazing! That’s the miracle of science! Before this all parents had was benadryl in the pudding, and what were you supposed to do if your kid din’t like pudding?! You were fucked! This is just like those daycare workers that got fired for buzzing those kids’ unibrows. They should have gotten a thank you and instead they got a court date. SMH. I hope none of these kids sleep for a year.