Newborn Bear Cubs Found In Trash Can In Russia: And Somebody's About To Be Dinner
Two newborn bear cubs were found curled up in a dumpster in a Moscow suburb Friday.
The baby bears were given to the International Fund for Animal Welfare and were scheduled to be transported to a bear rescue center in the Tver region, some 200 miles northwest of the Russian capital.The tiny bears were hand fed instant baby food from a bottle by specialists from Moscow's environment department.
When are we going to fucking learn. Baby bears are not for trash cans. If you wrong animals, they will finish you. I’ll say this: it’s been a month full of a lot more animal vengeance stories than stories animals being wronged. We’ve got that poacher who got eaten by the lions he was hunting. We’ve got snakes stealing cash in Nigeria. Yesterday we even saw the introduction of a snake that was digesting an entire deer in its belly. So, you’ll understand my surprise at the audacity of some russian idiot to toss a couple of bears in the trash. Why is this audacious, aka the fancy word for stupid?
Let’s start with the animal. We’re talking bears here. The most protective animals in the fucking business. I just finished watching a video of a mama bear fighting off a tiger to protect her cubs. This wasn’t even like a grizzly bear, this was like an asian tree bear which I would have picked ten times out of ten to lose to Shere Khan. This is not a species that dislikes its young. Quite the contrary. Fastest way to kill yourself is to look at a bear cub the wrong way. That’s a fact. When you toss a bear cub in the trash can, you mark yourself for life. You don’t think that cub’s going to remember your face? You toss two in there, you’re as good as dead.
Because the newborns have had minimal contact with humans, it was hoped they could be taught survival skills at the bear rescue center and then released into the wild.
They're sending these things back out into the wild? You're dead meat! If Mom doesn't get you then these cute bears are going to grow up into scary bears and make you pay for throwing them in the trash!
If I got left in a trash can as a kid I'd be drinking too.
Second let’s talk the geographic context: Russia. Russia’s like the Florida of the US; anything can happen there. In Russia, people still very much get eaten by bears. I'm pretty sure people still get eaten by bears in the middle of cities. You’re not tossing a couple of black bears into a dumpster in Times Square bub, you are very much in the boonies. You’ve got big ass Chernobyl bears hunting all over the place. I don’t know much about Russian geography but I know that there’s a lot of open space. More than enough space for some bears to really hold a grudge. The craziest stuff happens in Russia. It’s something in the water. Crazy stuff happens and it all gets caught on camera. Bears attacking a guy and dumping his body parts in a dumpster while the cubs watch from the curb? That doesn’t even make the top 10 list of craziest Russian videos.
